There’s the final whistle, Everton have been smashed 5-0 tonight, and it could have been much worse. That is the only silver lining to take away from this game.
90+3’ - Allan decides to take a shot from outside the box to run out some clock, well over.
90’ - How much more misery is Stuart Attwell going to add here? At least three minutes is the unfortunate answer.
84’ - Spurs freekick conceded by Coleman. Reguilon’s ball skims past two Spurs players and goes just wide.
81’ - Branthwaite isn’t acquitting himself with honours here either, as Kulusevski has pretty much had the beating of him this half.
77’ - Coleman cross cut out for a corner. Gordon’s corner is partly cleared to Dele, he passes back to Gordon and the flag is up, he’s come back from an offside position.
74’ - Everton’s first corner. Too low from Gordon on the left, cleared. Bergwijn runs away from the Scouser who tugs his shirt and is lucky to not concede a foul.
68’ - Everton sliced wide open again as sub Steven Bergwijn gets behind the backline now, his shot is straight at Pickford.
Dele Alli gets a big round of applause as he comes on for the hitherto invisible Dominic Calvert-Lewin.
66’ - If anyone’s still reading this and/or cares, Spurs have looked a threat every time they have gotten the ball in the Everton half. The Blues? They’re still yet to show up.
60’ - Frank Lampard in damage limitation mode here, takes off Donny van de Beek (who has actually been decent today) for Vitalii Mykolenko. Good on the home crowd for giving the Ukrainian a round of applause.
55’ - Another turnover, another goal, and it’s Kane again, making it 5-0. Horrendous giveaway from Coleman comes to Doherty, and Kane volleys in brilliantly to the far post and in.
53’ - DCL shows quick feet in the box and gets off a low shot at the far post, wide and Richarlison is late sliding in there.
Kulusevski cuts in on a break and it takes an Allan intervention to put his shot wide for a corner. Taken short and Son is in space, into the box and cleared for another corner by Branthwaite. Deeper this time, falls to an unmarked Kane, his cross back in is headed onto the bar by Eric Dier. This is just downright embarrassing by the Blues.
46’ - 4-0 Spurs. 45 seconds into the second half and Everton are torn apart again as Tottenham pour forward in waves lining up to shoot, and substitute Reguilon slots home.
Jarrad Branthwaite has come on for Keane by the way, didn’t make any difference there as the high line got caught out again.
Halftime Thoughts - Lampard will thrive/perish playing on the front foot it looks like. Doubly disappointing because we defended really well against Manchester City, and a similar set-up and effort would have probably worked here, instead he’s trying to go toe-to-toe with a team that destroyed City’s high line, and here we are.
45+2’ - Holgate’s clearance catches Keane full in the face and he will need medical attention. Pretty much summarizes Everton’s first half today.
There’s the halftime whistle, and Doucoure and Hojbjerg are getting into a shoving match as they have to be separated. Spurs lead 3-0 at the break, Everton have had nothing in front of goal.
All for being on the front foot but I'm surprised Lampard really thought this was the way after watching Spurs destroy City's high-line two weeks ago and then watch us try and break down, *checks notes*, non-league Boreham Wood.— Michael (@greenallefc) March 7, 2022
44’ - Everton have held the ball in the attacking third for well over two minutes now without even getting a shot. Spurs are doing well keeping them at bay.
37’ - 3-0 Spurs. Kane easily dispatches it past Pickford in tons of space. It was a lucky ricochet but the Blues high line was caught stranded and decimated by Spurs’ pace.
34’ - Another Spurs break down the Everton right, ball falls to Doherty eventually from a narrow angle and Pickford saves well for a corner. Taken short and cleared by Coleman off Kane’s foot right in front of the goalie.
Son’s corner is low, Richy clears.
30’ - Richarlison goes down from a wild hack by Sergio Romero. The Argentine is an old adversary of Richarlison’s, and he is rightly booked. Freekick is too high and too close to Hugo Lloris and he collects easily, still no shots for the Blues.
28’ - Somehow it’s not 3-0. Son clear in on goal and not a defender in sight, Pickford comes out and make a great save, and the rebound falls to Kane and he puts it wide with the goal gaping. Lucky.
24’ - Son the first name in the book tonight as he tugs Gordon back after the youngster was making a break.
21’ - Everton are not going to get out of this relegation battle if they keep beating themselves.
17’ - And just like that Spurs lead 2-0. Everton still moping about as Son gets behind Holgate and Kane finds him, his shot squirms under birthday boy Jordan Pickford and this game looks like it’s gotten away from the Blues already.
14’ - Spurs goal. Sessegnon beats Coleman for pace, his cross into the middle evades Harry Kane and Keane puts it into his own net. Ugh, Spurs lead 1-0.
13’ - Everton are in a 3-5-2 actually, with Kenny and Gordon as the wingbacks.
11’ - Gordon does a great job tracking back to break up a Spurs chance as Son was breaking on goal with just Michael Keane to beat, and Ryan Sessegnon wide open on the Everton right.
Now the Blues break the other way and Gordon is hauled down by Son. Gordon’s freekick into the box is cleared though.
8’ - That said, the Blues have been the better side with winning more balls from exerting pressure.
6’ - Interesting start to the game, both sides holding on to the ball and passing it around without making too many inroads.
The Blues are continuing their new ways of playing out from the back, and it’s been hairy a couple of times as the home crowd egg the press on.
1’ - Underway in North London.
Frank Lampard has restored Dominic Calvert-Lewin to the starting lineup on his return from injury, but Demarai Gray has not recovered from his fever last week. It’ll be a 4-3-3 formation to go up against Antonio Conte’s 3-4-1-2.
Everton have the worst away record in the Premier League, managing just one win and three draws when not at Goodison Park this season. However, two of those six points have come away at Manchester United and Chelsea, so there is a sliver of hope that the Blues can put together a decent enough performance to come away with a point or more against a Tottenham side that has been strangely yo-yoing from game to game.
The Blues injury situation appears to be getting better with Dominic Calvert-Lewin and Demarai Gray expected to return for this one, and Frank Lampard will be able to welcome his three cup-tied players back to the squad too, including former Spurs player and talisman Dele Alli.
Competition: Premier League Matchday 14
Date and start time: Monday, March 7th at 12:00 p.m. PT / 3:00 p.m ET / 8:00 p.m. BST
Stadium: Tottenham Stadium, London, England, United Kingdom
Weather: 39°F/4°C, clear, 1% chance of precipitation, 12 mph winds
How to Watch/Listen
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Gamethread: Live blog above starting one hour before game time
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The Toffees recorded only their first win away at Tottenham since 2008 last season on opening day, with Dominic Calvert-Lewin rising highest to head home in a gritty defensive performance. The two sides played out a nil-nil stalemate at Goodison back in November in their previous meeting this season.