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Everton 2-2 Liverpool: Instant Reaction | Chaos

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A series of small heart attacks disguised as a football match.

FBL-ENG-PR-EVERTON-LIVERPOOL Photo by PETER BYRNE/POOL/AFP via Getty Images

I lost count of how many times I had to re-write this recap. There are no words left in my adequately sized vocabulary to describe this fixture. This is supposed to be published immediately at full time, but because I had to backspace until my fingers fell off, we’re running late. You’ll have to deal with it.

For the first time in years (and years), Everton played a match against Liverpool where you felt like things were on even footing. In between two ridiculous moments of violence from Jordan Pickford and Richarlison, the Blues looked like a team that deserved their table position, and for once, a break went their way in the form of a VAR decision that could be loosely described as “what the hell just happened?”

Everton v Liverpool - Premier League Photo by Andrew Powell/Liverpool FC via Getty Images

Dominic Calvert-Lewin scored his 10th domestic goal of the season on the heels of another Michael Keane score. James Rodriguez was brilliant, again, and Lucas Digne reminded the world why he is one of the best left backs in the world.

Liverpool will feel aggrieved by a number of things from this match, including the result. Pardon me, I’ll be over here not caring.