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An Everton Thanksgiving

We here at Royal Blue Mersey would like to extend a Happy Thanksgiving to all of our American readers. To all of our readers in the UK and around the world, I thought I'd take this opportunity to share some of the sights and smells of the holiday with you all. But this being an Everton blog, of course there has to be an Everton twist as well.


While Thanksgiving is a time to spend with family and friends and express our gratitude for all of the blessings in our lives, the most famous tradition of the holiday is the Thanksgiving feast (though American football comes a close second). Today, while enjoying a delicious meal with my family, I came up with a crazy idea: comparing the current Everton squad to the foods traditionally eaten on Thanksgiving. This might end up being one of the weirder things I've ever written, but you know what, one of the things I'm thankful for today is that my favorite football team has finally started a season well and has actually become fun to watch.

Hey, it's guaranteed to make you hungry at the very least.

Turkey - Marouane Fellaini

There were two ways I could go with this: calling someone a turkey is usually an insult implying that the person is stupid or dumb in some way, but the turkey is also the centerpiece of the Thanksgiving meal. I decided to go with the second definition, as Fellaini has easily become the centerpiece of this Everton team.

Stuffing - Leighton Baines
Just as the stuffing complements the turkey and makes it taste better, Baines and his picture-perfect crosses make Fellaini a better player. See where I'm going with this now?

Gravy - Steven Pienaar
Another way to complement the main course of turkey is to slather it in gravy. Gravy can also work well with stuffing.

Cranberry sauce - Tony Hibbert
For as long as I can remember, cranberry sauce has been associated with Thanksgiving. While it can be a little plain by itself, cranberry sauce pairs well with other foods and is a comforting constant.

Giblet gravy - Seamus Coleman
This is a gravy that can split opinions. Some say that it is delicious and people just need to give it a chance, while others say that is sloppy and a little gross.

Mashed potatoes - David Moyes
To me, mashed potatoes are probably the key to the entire Thanksgiving meal. We often overlook mashed potatoes in favor of foods with more flair, but really we're lucky to have this dish and its delicious simplicity.

Wine - Sylvain Distin
Like a fine wine, Distin gets better with age.

Dinner rolls - Phil Neville
Rolls are a staple of any feast and can be tasty in small quantities, but eat too many and they may make you sick to your stomach.

Stuffed peppers - Ross Barkley
These seem like they would be really delicious, but at the end of the dinner they are inexplicably the least touched item on the table.

Green bean casserole - Leon Osman
Another dish that's been a Thanksgiving tradition for a long time. Underrated and should really get more attention internationally.

Pumpkin pie - Nikica Jelavic
You can't go wrong with pumpkin pie. It's the perfect finisher to a great meal.

Cherry pie - Tim Howard
This might be one of my lazier comparisons, but cherry pie is an American tradition after all.

Lemon meringue pie - Darron Gibson
When this first got brought to my family's Thanksgiving dinner, it was not nearly as anticipated as pumpkin pie and nobody was really too excited to eat it. Surprisingly, it has become a hit and now we don't know how we ever celebrated Thanksgiving without it.

Sweet potato casserole - Kevin Mirallas
This casserole, which has just a touch of sweetness, was a new addition to our Thanksgiving meal this year. Everyone seemed to love it instantly.

Celery and dip - John Heitinga
The perfect combination of sensibility and excitement.

Nuts - Steven Naismith
Since we still don't really know what we have in Naismith, he's a tough nut to crack. Okay, I'm running out of ideas here. Although Naismith did act a little nutty in a recent World Cup qualifier.

Soda - Shane Duffy
Like these beverages, Duffy was a refreshing presence in the team for awhile last year.

Candy turkeys - Bryan Oviedo
I'm not sure what exactly these are, but they're fun and weirdly kind of awesome.

Leftovers - Thomas Hitzlsperger
We're saving this food that no one else wanted. We still think it could be put to good use.

Dirty dishes - Phil Jagielka
Jagielka cleans up other people's messes and does the dirty work that sometimes goes unnoticed.

Coffee - Apostolos Vellios
If you're feeling sluggish and need a little energy at the end of a hearty Thanksgiving meal, a cup of joe can really hit the spot.

Burnt dinner rolls - Magaye Gueye
These started out promising and at one time we thought they might actually turn out good, but now we just keep them around in case we run out of other foods.

Plate of olives and pickles - Jan Mucha
Really, does this have a point?

Deviled eggs - Victor Anichebe
These can be good, but they sure can stink.